"Those skinny little monkeymen and their fancy-shmancy 'tools'... Ha! THIS is how to live, watching Funniest Neanderthals on your butt all day!"

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"This idiocy will be much more entertaining when someone invents TV. I prefer my idiocy televised."

"My progeny will be CEO of Goldman Sachs - I will pass down this skill"

"With that oily hair and dried grass skirt, you just know this isn't going to end well."

Breitbart's proof that the Flying Karamozov Brothers juggling troupe actually predated Dostoevsky's Brothers Karamazov

Brilliant brilliant.

Brilliant