Road rash on my bottom.

Happy Jubilee!

I've had these glasses for 4 years & not worn them in 3 & a half. It hurts. I'm a 1950's binman.

I've just got my @spottedbylocals cards! Who will be the next selection of fabulous places to be chosen?

Barcelona y'all.

I was the 95th fastest in Stockport at the Manchester 10km! Bang!

Go soccerball at the Olympics! I got the golden ticket!

If the Olympic flame goes out, we're on standby.

The old Coco's / Volts / Heaven & Hell nightclub almost bulldozed. Stockport won't miss you.

@ohthedecadence @yuecake Awesome dress is Awesome. Ever heard of Fenn Wright Manson?

I never buy stuff for myself. Today I was selfish. Shorts, a new running shirt & Richard Hawley back catalogue. http://twitpic.com/9k9ie1

I never buy stuff for myself. Today I was selfish. Shorts, a new running shirt and some Richard Hawley back catalogue.

Jessie J bukkake party in Primark!

Breaking news! I have just got the new Mystery Jets album through the post. Huzzah!

We've come home to a surprise package from @mangechester. #pigfest is going to rock.

In hops we trust. Brew Dog Manchester.

How much do you think I can get for my Tango gotan doll in #fourrooms

@jon_mcewen What is this? Is it a peregrin falcon? It was on the folks shed this week.

York yeah? Travelodge yeah?