I am a big girl

Cakeception!

I enjoy the intimation that Devendra's beard is a creature in its own right.

@watsoncomedian I feel like you should get this for young Master Watson, it has new pornos, national etc x

Who needs sleep?!

That's right, enclosed pond with no roof or door. Why?

For @SamWhyte

Who sent this, is it for me birthday?

I am now officially a big enough queer that rainbows spontaneously appear in my presence

Magic goo!

We must be on holiday. Sozzled by 6 O'clock and dad has randomly purchased me some walking boots

@MissMadLiza it's a really fine knit

How would one remove a security tag such as this without liquid nitrogen?

I have enjoyed some horrifyingly coloured things in my time but I think this wins. Blue.

Cat looks like he's nesting

I'm not normally want to drink in the day, but what else are you going to do in this weather?

My skates are getting steadily more garish as I get then comfy. I am rocking the leopard print and rainbows

I have fat knees

I like this. *basks*

That's a beauty #bruisewatch #derbyisfun