Shoo. Leave me alone to die. #newgirl

What part of "fuck off, bitches" don't you understand? #friends

Happy birthday to my joy and heartache. I love you no matter what.

I've missed him so much that I unabashedly smothered the poor thing with kisses. (Sorry, @JariL.)

As for TWO-TIME EMMY WINNER Jim Parsons being snubbed this year after last year's win … #GoldenGlobes #bigbangtheory

Yes, I started the New Year with a Big Bang. (Sadly, this is devoid of a crude double entendre.) Thanks, @vikkicar! #bigbangtheory

I miss you so much it hurts.

"In a few minutes, when I gloat over the failure of this enterprise, how would you prefer I do it? The standard 'I told you so' with the classic 'neener-neener'? Or just my normal look of haughty derision?" - Dr. Sheldon Cooper #bigbangtheory

@thedavidcook That wasn't a dream, silly.

Product placement, you say? Before @montyanderson, I believe there was THIS corporate puppet. For shame!

5 Emmy nods, baby. To @billprady, Jim Parsons, Johnny Galecki, @KaleyCuoco, @simonhelberg, @kunalnayyar & the rest of the #bigbangtheory gang ... OPA!

Wishing the cast and crew of @TheNormalHeart a most sublime final performance tonight!

Well, whaddya know? I can see clearly now.

"'Tis better to have loved and lost ..." Shakespeare? Really, Raj? Holy Tennyson snub, Sheldor! #bigbangtheory

#bigbangtheory spoiler: Being upset over this is not normal behavior. Oh look, the men in white coats are here.

Not a day goes by that I don’t miss their furry hugs & slobbery kisses. Happy birthday to my gentle baby Rico & my silly boy Bobby, both of whom I'll love forever.

Why does EVERYTHING taste better after 2 AM?

Happy birthday to the crazy sexy talented (not to mention hilarious) @michael_johns! Rock on, mate.

I love pretty cakes that taste divine. My hips hate 'em. And you know they don't lie. Shakira told us so.

@DavidArchie charming the socks off over 60,000 screaming fans in Manila back in the Summer of '09.